Friday, May 28, 2010

Taking a cue from a great friends Blog I have decided to make a list of things I think are attractive in guys.
PS - Check out my friend Trinettes Blog at
I love her! She is an honest, powerful, creative, passionate God loving whirlwind and I love when I get to hang out with her!

My list is as follows :

Love Handles
nerdy non-obscene t-shirt collections
Scottish, Irish, British or Australian accents...ok, most accents
the ability to discuss without arguing
having man-skills ie: hunting, cars, etc
Zach Braff, Seth Rogan, Tyson Ritter, Adam Lambert (...yes, I know!!), Jeffery Dean Morgan
curly hair, baldies or red heads
a great laugh and sense of humor
laying in the grass under a tree and talking
Hockey games
loves animals
- except for cats
facial hair and stubble
big thighs
good kisses
appreciates art, music - culture, etc
an open mind and soft heart
showing emotion
being able to be in each others company but not HAVE to fill every silence
Great, easy smile and gives good hugs

For years I have had the description of the Lover in Song of Songs 5:10-16 bookmarked in my Bible because 1) the description appeals to me :) 2) I believe if I am supposed to be with someone, and God knows the desires of my heart, my man will bear a striking (although non-coincidental) resemblance to this description. Call me crazy, but I've thought that for years.

So, whilst I enjoy my season of singleness, I will be wishin' and hopin' and thinkin' and prayin' for my Song of Songs man :)

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Coffee for One

So lately I’ve been saying how happy I am. But now, today, I don’t know. I’ve been so happy because I am dating someone. I was happy single. But it’s been nice to have someone want me. I haven’t had that for a long, long time. I’ve been thinking just today, “do I want this?” “Is this person the best there is for me?” If it is, quite honestly that makes me very sad. He’s a nice person, I for the most part enjoy his company. I love that he wants to touch me. I like cooking for someone who enjoys my cooking. And the look on people’s faces when I say I am dating someone…that makes me sad too. Like they are happy I’m with someone no matter who it is. So much importance is placed on a persons ability to attract a mate. And if you are alone, “Well, you must be deficient in some way.” “Why doesn’t anyone want to be with you?” You are too fat, too independent, too loud and outspoken, too intelligent or too intellectual. A life of chosen singlehood is relatively unheard of outside of the church. And while I have told more people than I should have about this relationship, because I wanted them to know I was dating, I wish I wouldn’t have. I was happy for all the reasons listed above, but I doubt it’s a forever thing. And I don’t know that I want to marry him. He is a good man, a decent and caring man. But I don’t know that he’s my forever man. I don’t know. I voiced this concern to my friend Jayne tonight (4/24) for the first time and it felt good to say it outloud.

I could be single for the rest of my life and be happy as long as I am surrounded by friends and company and friends. In fact, if this man and I break up, I probably will be single for the rest of my life. It doesn’t scare me. In fact I kind of like it. It doesn’t make you a lonely person. Believe me there is nothing more lonely than being the only person involved in a two person relationship. As a wise woman once said “It would take one hell of a man to be better than no man.”

(Post Script : as of 5/11 I currently am single. I’m feeling great about it. Balanced and at peace, etc. I’m looking forward to making the most of what is shaping up to be a GREAT summer!)

I think I may be built to be single. I don't think I know how to be in a relationship. Which is fine with me. I kind of like to come and go as I please, make my own plans, do my own thing. Are there benefits to being in a relationship - I'm sure there are. But for right now, I'm looking forward to a season of singleness!