I was here –
A great song by Lady Antebellum and everytime I hear it I wonder “What mark have I made? Who will remember me? How will they remember me?” This song is like a call to DO SOMETHING with my life! Everytime I hear it I am inspired and defeated at the same time. But I imagine those two emotions go hand in hand for many people. On the one hand I am totally jazzed to get out there and do – What?! And then the defeat kicks in. How? Who can I reach? Who would listen to me? What am I even trying to say? I don’t have the literary background to write the ideas and questions that are in my brain. Most of them aren’t of cultural importance anyway. Just every thought every mid-twenties individual has – who am I? How did I get here in life? How do I move past here to a place personal peace and contentment? What does actually make me tick?
I love doing massage. I am happy I went to massage school. The school and the state of Colorado changed my life. How do I translate my transformation into something meaningful to others? What if massage doesn’t always do it for me for the rest of my life? I want to go back to school for History. Then I get into the physical roadblocks to my happiness. Namely – money. But I digress J
(If I haven’t said it before, I have a hard time staying focused and on topic. One of the many reasons I will never be a writer J)
I was inspired this year by a former teacher and currently close friend. While I was in high school, she was my speech coach. The woman has had more of an impact on me than all the other women in my life combined. I am grateful for her continuous wisdom and knowledge, her amazing warped sense of humor, boundless charity, and so many other positive qualities – so many so that I am running out of words to describe the greatness I see in her. So like I was saying, I was inspired by her this year. I volunteered to help her coach speech. I enjoyed competeing in speech in high school and thought “If I affect one student in even the smallest way like she made an impact on me, it was worth it.” I don’t know if I did, but I got to work with some incredibly talented, passionate and thoughtful kids and it was so worth it. They were my daily dose of laughter in a life that had been so drab.